Everything Is Falling Apart.If I'm gone don't, don't look for me. I'm probably in a better place. Don't wake me, my dreams are probably better than reality. I'm lost at sea on a raft that's barely floating, drifting into unknown territory.
ToxicityYou kiss me to draw the words from my mouthOh whut a sweet sin this taste is.If I slit my wrists would I bleed out red?If I died right here,Would you love me instead?
Lonely RainAs liquid drops form on everything,I look around,The whole world becomes anew,I can feel the darkness being washed from me,Slipping away drop by drop,Slowly,In this lonely rain,
A LetterIt's been a while since we've spoken; eleven months maybe? The days seem to go by, the seasons change, but it still doesn't feel the same. I'm getting better slowly, it doesn't hurt as much as it used to but I still find myself crying at night. There's someone new in my life; he's amazing, but I still feel my heart ache for something I can't have. Death is sadistic thing. It haunts you until you can't take it anymore and drains your life of happiness. Maybe in eleven more months I'll be okay again.
LostI wish I could find myself at the bottom of an empty bottle,Or the pack of cigarettes lying next to me,But it doesn't feel right without you,Nothing could ever stop this pain spreading from my chest,An ache from the deepest depths of my splintered soul,Part of me left with you,But who am I now?
Trapped TruthThe truth is, I can’t get close to anyone because I know no one will ever truly understand me. No one will take the time to understand my demons. Talk to my monsters. Soothe my raging beasts. I’m alone in my darkness and I always will be. Trapped forever and no one will ever love me.
Maybe One DayThere once was a girl, a girl and her best friend. She was madly in love with him and he never knew. It was better that way. Her, silently dying inside. Him, obliviously in love with a sin. She forced herself every day to remember that he could never love her like she did him. He remained in the dark about her love until the very end. Every sin ends one day, she wanted it to come so badly, but at the same time she didn’t. Two hearts, both intertwined, both torn. Two sides of a broken piece that one day may fit together to form a new one. Only time would tell.
I Need YouI hear your voice in the distance,But it's too far away,All I can see is darkness,All I can feel is numb,Just the intake of breath is difficult,And with each step I get nowhere,I’m lost within the darkness of my soul,Where are you when I need you most,I hear you,But with each word you’re farther away,Don’t leave me here,I can’t do this on my own,I’m fading away slowly,Please save me,Soon everything I am will be gone.
Moments.So here we are again,Laying in silence,The regret on these sheets is self evident,But not from me,You fall asleep and I just lay there,My thoughts race back through my memories,I realize I've never been this happy,What's swirling around your dreams is a mystery,I may not see this again,It will forever remain in my memory,Your sleeping face is calming,You're even smiling,But even behind that is chaos.
How To Fit InHow to Fit InLet’s start off with your appearance.Because you need a disguise to hideInside of a crowd.Strip yourself of all of the clothing you use to express yourself.So you can get lost,And never be found.Fix your hair,Cake on some make upBecause in a crowd.Looks will always speak louder than words.People don’t want to hear what you have to say,They just want to see a pretty face.Fix your eyes that are too big.Too innocent.You have too many ideas.They rage around inside your head,Like birds trying to escape a cage.Free them.But never write those ideas down on a page.Because thinking,Is a sin.When you’re trying to fit in.Just let them fly away.Never to be seen again.Now that you’re vapid,Dull as a rock.Not an original thought to be seen.Yes, you’ve achieved‘Fitting in’But was it actually worth it?Trading in everything that makes you so spectacular.To fit in with the rest of the main stream crowd.Stop trying to
radiancei am runningon blood and lightheart full,hands emptyfluttering firefly chasmsin spaces oncefilled.i spit silver silencesthat colour quickfirea vivid fragilityand dissipate,anticipation collidingwith anxiety.running airborneand unfulfilledi'm not faded;i'm flying.
He Doesn'tHe Doesn't Love You.He onlyLovesThe ideaOf you. He Doesn't Treasure You.Not thePersonYou trulyAre.Only your body.He doesn't CareWhat You say.Only What You Wear.He doesn't Pay attentionTo what mattersTo you.Only to what has value to him.To him,You are Just like,Everyone else.Don't You Even ThinkOf sellingYour marvelous selfShort.
A Letter To The Girl Who Hates Her BodyA letter to the girl who hates her body.A letter to that girlWho scrolls through tumblr.Admiring all of those models.With thigh gaps that look cute with skirts.And a waist that you can barely see.You're beautifulA letter to the girlWho looks at models,For their curves.The way their hips go outwardsAnd their size D cup breasts.You're beautiful.Please don't look in the mirror,And hate the girl you see.That girl is youAnd she should be loved unconditionally.Because you deserve love.And how much love is not determined on your waist size,Whether you're chubby or skinnyYou're still so very pretty.You're so perfect.So for every time you look in that mirror.And tell yourself you aren't worth it.That you're arms are too big,Your hips aren't big enough.Stop.Tell yourself.I am a woman.A lady.I am strong.I have a body like a castle.A kingdom made just for me.And I will not destroy that castle,By trying to starve myself.By taking brick by brick and dismantling it
Dreaming Keeps the Dreamer SaneTo the dreamer.The one who sits and stares into corners of the class room.Dreaming of some place better.Whether that place is real or not.It is just anywhere other than here.We paint over the whites of the walls.Our minds are the paint and our eyes are the brushes.Turning ordinary objects into castles that stand 30 feet tall.And people into characters for our plays,That fill our imaginative brains.We tune out the lectures out of boredom or from wanting to escape.We turn the blank of our note book's pageInto a mess of jumbled words of a song.That we once heard as a conversation in a coffee shop,It sounded like a soft tune then, just filling the silenceWith soft mumbles and whispers,Of a stranger's life that we heard bits and pieces of.We create symphonies out of the rainAs the thunder rolls in the distance.We turn the noise into music in our brains.Something to distract us from the pain,Because in the end,Dreaming keeps the dreamer sane.
The Girl Who Was Afraid To BeShe speaks to me fondlyof passions and talents,of guitars and stars,with such breathless intensitythen stops short andapologisesfor speaking at all.All because somewhere in her life,someone she loved broke her heartby ignoringher beautiful wordsand telling her toshut up,keep it down,nobody cares.People aren’t born sad.We make them that way.
That's So Gay"That's so gay,"Is what you say,But silently,You've pushed oneOf your friends away."Oh no, honey,Boys don't playWith Barbie dolls."By enforcing gender roles,You are killingYour kids,And telling themThat you'll love them no matter what**Conditions apply.Don't push your loved onesAwayWith things you do or say,Because words hurt;But they hurt mostFrom the mouths ofThe people that told you,They'd always love you.Saying, "that's so gay",Or making them behaveIn a gendered way,Is telling themThat it's not okayTo be somethingThey can't help.(And even if they could,Why wouldIt matter?)And it will hurt themForever,And every time you're together,They'll be wondering;"Am I wrong?""Do I really belong?"Every time you say something like,"That's so gay",You burn someone's trust away.And you can't build anything backFrom ash.
You Can't Compare PainAny pain is valid.Some pain might be stronger than others,And might be there for more tragic reasons.But don't tell someone to be tougher.Because someone else has it rougher than them.The person you're saying that toWhile the stuff they're going throughMight not be as bad as stuff others are.It is still pain.And pain hurts no matter what type of rainWhether a drizzle or a downpour.You're still going to feel the ice cold water pelletsOn your skin.I've heard someone say,That you can't be depressed because you have a roof over you head.And while I am very, very sorry that some can't say the same.You should be ashamedFor saying such a thing.Pain is not something that can be ranked,It is not something you can compare.We all still feel depression and despair.Because we're all humans with emotionsEveryone gets sad.So don't go and make someone feel badFor feeling a certain way.
A midnight confessionWhen sadnessenveloped me,I only wishedto put a stampon it,and send it away(the result alwaysthe same:return to sender)
ConnectionAs I fall asleep,I dream of you,The way your smile makes my heart soar,The way your words make my mind's trouble sleep,The way your soul collides with mine,As we form a connection,That stretches across time.